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| Patty's family Zooming |
Jean:
“Valerie, why are we doing this?”
Val:
“Because it will be fun, Mom. And you don’t have to sit so close to the screen.”
Jean:
“I
know how to Zoom, for heaven’s sake—”
Val:
“And
you don’t have to shout, either. I can hear you just fine. Why don’t you turn
down the volume—”
Kit:
“For
crying out loud, Val, why is your mother screeching—”
Val: “She
can hear you, Kit. Mom, just sit back, talk normally, and enjoy. Okay, now I
think you’ve put yourself on mute.”
Jean: “I
can’t hear you with this mask on.”
Val:
“You
probably don’t need the mask inside—”
Kit:
“Or
the gloves.”
Emily:
“Hi.
Grandma!”
Val:
“Mom, hit the mute button again.”
Jean:
“Is that you, Emily? Why didn’t you tell me Emily was going to be on this Zoom?”
Val: “I
did tell you. And hi, honey.”
Kit:
“So
Valerie, tell me again: why are we doing this?”
Val:
“Because
it’s fun to see each other. Mom, you’ve muted yourself again.”
Kit:
“Val,
I just saw you two hours ago. And last night. And the day before. Can I be excused?”
Val:
“No, you cannot. This is fun. Mom, what is that noise?”
Jean:
“It’s William Stuckey vacuuming. William Stuckey, stop that right now!”
Val:
“Mom,
turn the volume down.”
Elaine:
“Hi, everyone! Sorry I’m late.”
Kit:
“Who’s she?”
Val:
“Kit, she can hear you. It’s Elaine, Buddy’s wife. Hi, Elaine.”
Elaine:
“Is something wrong? I was worried when I got your text. I was afraid—”
Val:
“No, nothing’s wrong. I just thought this would be fun—Mom, you’ve moved the
screen. We can’t see—”
Kit:
“So when does it begin?”
Val:
“What do you mean begin? It’s already started.”
Kit:
“I
mean the fun. When does the fun begin? And why are we looking at your Mom’s
knees?”
Val:
“Mom,
move the screen higher. And take yourself off mute. And Emily, tell us how you
are, for Pete’s sake.”
Jean:
“Emily, you look very thin. Are you eating?”
Emily: “Yes,
Grandma, I’m eating, and—”
Elaine:
“Emily, you do look thin—”
Jean:
“She looks just fine, Elaine—”
Elaine:
“But you just said—”
Kit:
“Oh, you are right, Val; this is fun—”
Val:
“Please,
everyone; don’t all talk at once.”
Everyone:
“What?”
Val:
“Oh hell. I have stuff to do. Let’s try this again another time.”
Kit:
“Will it be as much fun?”
Val: “Yes, dammit, it will be fun.”
