Let’s say you find yourself slapdab in the middle of a
murder/thriller/mystery. You need a piece of vital information to save
yourself, the country, the planet. And let’s say your informant is an evil,
reprehensible character known to travel with two Dobermans, Adolph and Ava,
trained to rip out throats. Our dastardly informant agrees to meet you in a
vacant warehouse at midnight, down by the docks. Oh, and you should come alone.
However, since you are the author of this plan to save the
world, you don’t have to play by your informant’s rules. So the question is,
who are you going to take with you?
Who’s the toughest, bravest, cleverest person you know? Who’s handy with a weapon if needed? Who can
outsmart our dangerous mole? And more importantly, who can follow the GPS
instructions to actually find the docks—in the dark?
Well, since this is all make-believe, sort of, we can take
anyone we like. Gibbs from NCIS
springs to mind. He fits all the requirements, although he’s a little too quick
to slap a person on the back of the head when he’s displeased. Monk is
certainly smart enough, but we’re worried he’d be hampered by doggy doo-doo
bags if Adolph and Ava get busy. The X-Men, who we understand are a team of
mutant superheroes, probably would be a safe bet. And of course, any of the
James Bonds would be okay, although we’d prefer Sean Connery because he’s
always so tidy, even after a rumble.
But we’re going to settle on our friend Sarah. She’s more a
super-grandma than a superhero. But she’s brave. She’s killed cockroaches the
size of a polar bear, and she once wrestled a deranged cat (albeit wearing a
beekeeper’s outfit at the time). She’s more than handy with a gun. At the
shooting range, two government-type guys with gold badges on their belts said,
“Nice shooting, ma’am.” She’s supersmart;
the paper she wrote titled “Rise to Globalism” earned an A (we won’t mention
who she wrote it for). And she doesn’t need a dang GPS system; she can find any
place, any time, even in the dark. Plus, she’s the biggest dog lover we know,
so she’d have Adolph and Ava rolling over to have their bellies scratched in
five minutes.
We’d feel safe with her anywhere. Who would you pick, and
why?
Seriously. We want to know.
Sarah: a
match for any Viking!
Sarah
with weapon at the ready.
Super Sarah
taking aim.
Sarah, Roz and Patty
